The past couple of days have been real rough on me. I changed from the Atkins to Weight Watcher’s weight loss program. Who knows why…other than the dizziness I was feelilng from Atkins after a week - and people told me they lost a ton of weight on WW. Well, after just a couple of days on Atkins I lost weight. After 3 days on WW - I lost nothing. I know…I needed to give it a chance but when I know I’ll lose on one - why change to the other? Anyway, I changed back to Atkins today. Wish me luck!

Tonight we went to dinner and it was great to walk downtown, see all the restaurants and bars and the “downtown scene” but…what I liked most was not getting hot. It was so cool to feel the fresh cool air. Later this weekend it will get back up to the high 70’s but for now…I’m enjoying my son, his girlfriend and the cool-cool weather. Life is cool!

A few months ago while I was at a friends house, a commercial came on her television for an upcoming episode of a show called, “Moment of Truth” where a very large woman asked a young man sitting in a chair on a stage, “Do fat people repulse you?” Cue the dramatic music and fade to commercial.

I didn’t comment on it at the time with my friend, though I admit, both our eyes were glued to the television hoping we’d get to see what this man had to say about it. Of course the point of a television teaser for a show is to get you to tune in, so I just assumed by the look on his face and the way he squirmed a bit that his answer was yes.

For some reason this morning I was compelled to do a search on the internet and sure enough, fat people DO repulse him. It made my head spin at the number of results that Yahoo! brought up on the subject. It seems more than 170,000 websites have something to say on the subject.

As we all get sucked in to the internet sometimes when doing searches, I started clicking and reading a few of the thoughts from around the world on just how repulsive fat people are. Everything from pity to the suggestion that we be rounded up and put in to camps until we are thin was suggested.

All this reading was making my head spin and I had to just stop looking and ask myself the very personal question, being a fat person myself, “Do fat people repulse me?” My mind scrolled over the really big people I have encountered personally on my journey to get fit. Repulsion never entered in to my thoughts but feeling sorry for someone who tells me that they don’t know where to start hits home.

Unless you have avoided a movie because your butt won’t fit into a seat or said no to going to a cafe to have lunch when you were hungry due to the small size of the chairs, you won’t know where I’m coming from. The toughest part of being fat for someone like me who had weighed 440 pounds at my heaviest, is the way that the world looks at you.

People didn’t look through me or treat me like I was invisible. They looked like I was the fat lady who had escaped from the circus and they were getting a teaser for free. This does horrible things to your self esteem and when you think that we do this to ourselves, there is a lot of self loathing going on.

The bottom line is, fat people do NOT repulse me. Of course, I’m not comfortable enough in my own skin to say that is true for how I feel about myself. Perhaps someday.

Priscilla Houliston
Author of Little Changes
Visit Priscilla at http://www.LittleChanges.com/

To maintain your muscles, aim for 20 minutes of strength-training exercises two to three times a week – with at least one day off in between workouts so your muscles have time to rest, recover, and grow.

Liz Neporent, an exercise physiologist and the president of Wellness 360, a New York City-based corporate-wellness-consulting company, suggests the following seven exercises, which work most of the major muscles in your body.

Do one to three sets of 8 to 15 repetitions of the exercises, resting no more than 45 seconds between sets to keep the workout challenging. If you haven’t used weights before or if you’re out of shape, start with light weights (when they’re called for) of two to five pounds and do fewer sets.
Squat
Works: Buttocks and thighs

• Stand with your feet hip-width apart, weight slightly back on your heels, hands on your hips. Pull your abdominals in, standing up tall with square shoulders and a lifted chest.
• Sit back and down, as if there’s a chair directly behind you. Lower as far as you can without leaning your upper body more than a few inches forward. Don’t allow your knees to stick out past your toes.
• Straighten your legs and stand back up. Be careful not to lock your knees at the top of the movement.

One-Arm Row
Works: Upper and middle back and shoulders

• Stand to the left of a chair, feet hip-width apart. Hold a dumbbell in your right hand with your palm facing in. Pull your abdominals in and bend forward from the hips so your back has a slight arch and you are roughly parallel to the floor, knees slightly bent. Put your left hand on the chair’s seat for balance. Tilt your chin toward your chest so your neck is in line with the rest of your spine. Your right hand will be in front of your right shin.
• Pull your right arm up along the side of your body until your elbow points to the ceiling and your hand brushes against your waist.
• Slowly lower the weight back down. Complete the reps, then switch sides.

Modified Push-Up
Works: Chest, abdominals, shoulders and arms

• Lie on your stomach, knees bent and ankles crossed. Place your palms on the floor a bit to the side and in front of your shoulders. Tuck your chin a few inches into your chest so your forehead faces the floor.
• Straighten your arms and lift your body so you are balanced on your palms and knees, abdominals tight. Be careful not to lock your elbows.
• Bend your elbows and lower your entire body at once. Rather than trying to touch your chest to the floor, lower just until your upper arms are parallel to the floor. Push back up.

Shoulder Press
Works: Shoulders and arms

• Hold a dumbbell in each hand and sit up tall on a chair that has firm back support. Place your feet on the floor, hip-width apart. Pull your abdominals in so there is a slight gap between the small of your back and the back of the chair.
• With palms forward, bend the elbows and raise the dumbbells up so they are level with your ears. Elbows should be at or just below shoulder height.
• Straighten arms up over your head, without locking elbows, then slowly lower to start.

Bicep Curls
Works: Biceps

• Hold a dumbbell in each hand and stand with your feet hip-width apart. Let your arms hang down at your sides with your palms facing in. Pull your abdominals in, stand tall, and keep your knees relaxed.
• Curl your right arm up, fist close to your shoulder, twisting your palm so that it faces the front of your shoulder at the top of the movement. Slowly lower the dumbbell back down, then repeat with your left arm. Continue alternating until you’ve completed the set. (One rep consists of a bicep curl with each arm.)

Kick-Backs
Works: Triceps

• Stand to the left of a chair. Hold a dumbbell in your right hand, feet hip-width apart. Lean forward at the hips until your upper body is at a 45-degree angle to the floor. Place your free hand on top of the chair for support. Bend your right elbow so that your upper arm is parallel to the floor, your forearm perpendicular to it, and your palm facing in. Keep your elbow close to your waist. Pull your abdominals in and don’t lock your knees.
• Keeping your upper arm still, straighten your arm behind you until the end of the dumbbell is pointing down. Slowly bend your arm to lower the weight for one rep. When you’ve completed the set, repeat with your left arm.

Plank
Works: Abdominals, shoulders, chest, lower back, buttocks, thighs

• Lie on the floor, hands clasped in front of you roughly under your forehead, toes tucked under.
• Press up to balance on your forearms and toes. Pull your abs in so your lower back does not sag and your hips do not drop.
• Focus on keeping your torso straight and your abs pulled in to support you. Hold for 10 counts.

C: wait… SD: wait…

I confess: when I tried Splenda the first time, I was excited. It was sweet! Not slippery and weird like saccharin, not weirdly after-tasty like aspartame. In fact, to me it tasted even sweeter than real sugar. I was set!

I hooked up my bowls of Special K and my Starbucks iced teas with the stuff, feeling like I was doing good things for my body and was avoiding a jacked-up insulin response and potential sugar crashes. Awesome.

And then I started hearing things: that it was one molecule away from being powdered bleach and that maybe it wasn’t really “made from sugar” like the box suggested. My friend Mopie started joking that she was going to grow a second head out of her stomach (which she named Splenda Head and gave hilarious Audrey II monologues). I realized that the 16 calories from a teaspoon of ultrafine vanilla sugar on my cereal in the morning wasn’t going to kill me and I actually preferred the taste of unsweetened iced tea, so I walked away from Splenda like a one-night stand and have never looked back.

We’ve got actual healthy food substitutions that scratch that itch

Recently, researchers at Duke University announced that Splenda did all kinds of yuckiness to you: messes with the absorption of prescription drugs, screws with the “good” bacterial in your gut, and also contributes to obesity. Well, why not, because every frickin’ thing on the planet is said to contribute to obesity these days! Ah, but the Splenda people countered back that the study was actually paid for by the Sugar Association, who are incidentally the biggest Splenda haters on the planet. J’Accuse! Meanwhile, the corn people are all excited, yelling “Fight! Fight! Fight!” and hoping that everyone forgets the whole HFCS thing.

Do you use Splenda? Does this new study concern you? Have we not learned enough from the saccharin scares of the late ’70s (am I the only person old enough to remember drinking real TAB back in the day?) Tell your sweet, sweet secrets to the comments!

C: wait… SD: wait…

My dream has come true. I thought I’d been blessed when my hubby got me Adobe Illustrator CS3…but this is even better! Today, I proud to announce I now have Adobe Creative Suite Master Collection! Now…this is sweet! I’ll be up all night playing ;-)

Good News! There are three anti-aging treatments are proven clinically effective:

1) the topical application of retinol;

2) carbon dioxide laser;

3) injection of hyaluronic acid, a moisture-retaining acid that occurs naturally in the skin.

Coming from a family and era of sun worshipers I’ve shied away from the sun over the past few years. Considering where my hubby and I’ve lived for the past eight years, it’s quite a contrast.

In my mid-30’s I tried Retin-A for about six months until I realized I was way too young to see any difference. Now…I’m not but I also don’t live in a climate where I can use something that makes me so sensitive to the sun so…I rely on Mother Nature, good genes (not jeans), and MacDaddy sun block. (This is what my friend, Sheri, calls SPF 75.)

What I’ve found from the Archives of Dermatology is that the hands, face, neck and upper chest all suffer more than unexposed skin, and light-pigmented people wrinkle more readily than others. This damage is essentially an accelerated version of chronological aging. And, ultraviolet radiation from tanning beds induces production of the same enzymes that degrade collagen with age.

Each anti-aging treatment depends on the same mechanism, the interaction of skin cells called fibroblasts with the collagen they produce.

Topical application of retinol, a form of vitamin A, was the first to be proved useful. Although the molecular pathways are not well understood, retinol causes new collagen to form in chronologically aged skin and in skin damaged by ultraviolet light.

Skin creams with retinol are available over the counter, but many do not indicate the concentration of the active ingredient.

Carbon dioxide laser resurfacing, the healing wound produces more collagen after the laser removes thin layers of skin without damaging surrounding tissue.

Injecting a form of hyaluronic acid, similar to a substance the skin normally produces, into the dermis that underlies the wrinkles is the third proven form of anti-aging treatment. This was originally designed as a space filler, with no intended physiological effect. But as the injection stretches the dermis, the fibroblasts respond by producing more collagen and less matrix metalloproteinase, or MMP. There have been studies that have demonstrated that increased collagen production is visible within a month after the injection. The benefit lasts about six months.

Do the benefits of these treatments outweigh the risks?

“You lost your job, you’re out of shape, depressed, and we’ve spent all our savings. I’m leaving.”

Why is it that when the chips are down some couples make it and others don’t? Is it that promises before God that keeps couples together in times of crisis or is it stupidity? It’s probably neither.

When a couple has money in the bank, the kids are all doing fine, the jobs are well established, and the spark of lust still rings in the relationship nothing can break the bond of two people in love. But, when the kids are acting up, you become the neighborhood chauffeur with not even a ‘thank-you’, checking the kids homework takes precedence over combing your hair, taking a bath or using the bathroom, you hate your job, underpaid, under-appreciated, and overworked, and he isn’t any more happy with his job…is this when you start to wonder if it’s all worth it?

Is the grass greener on the other side of the fence where eliminating him (or her) from the picture seems so much easier than coping one more day?

Maybe, you feel held back by your partner’s choices or resentful that you couldn’t make your own decisions.

Do you spend more time crabbing about him than daydreaming about him?

Is she no longer ironing your shirts the way she should? Of course, she never did but not it’s getting on your very last nerve.

If you only had it to do over again you’d make a different choice…or would you?

What has kept you with your partner over the rough patches? If you left, why? It can’t be your promise before God since God is forgiving. It can’t be that you can’t support yourself, because you can.

My mother always told my two sisters and me that she stayed with my dad because neither of them wanted custody of us. Isn’t that something love to tell your children?

Let’s open up the discussion here for everyone to comment on what has kept their relationship (or that of a friend’s) together through the rough patches. We all have them…what’s happened with you?

This morning, my friend, Sara, sent me a message that, for me, hit real close to home. As you’ve read, she’s going through a divorce that is turning out to be more than a challenge than she’d hoped since her husband wants the divorce as much as she does.

She’s heard me say a million times that we are never given a challenge without also being given the opportunity to overcome that challenge and become stronger. At this point, she’s wondering just how strong she needs to be.

For the past four or five years, as Sara and her husband have moved closer to parting ways, she’s found her own approaches to becoming stronger. She sent me one of them this morning that I wanted to share with you.

“Concentrate on what you want.”

“When you think about what you don’t want to happen, it happens! Concentrating on what you fear and obsessing about negative outcomes has a way of manifesting disastrous images in your head. These images are very powerful and often turn into reality.

Instead, create pictures in your mind of what you want. Imagine the best possible outcome. Take a minute or two to do this everyday.

When you focus your energy toward things you really want, rather than toward what you don’t want, the universe will respond and deliver. Try it. It’s an amazing phenomenon that nurtures your desires.”

This piece is from Meditations for Women but even men can practice it. Until this morning I’d never read this piece but I truly believe it’s true. If you find yourself being negative, always cursing your problems and where you are in life…copy this affirmation and read it daily. Better yet, subscribe to my RSS feed at the top right of this website and you’ll see it all the time ;-).

~ Diana